Cleaning Out The Glenn Page Vaults, Part One

Over the next few months I'll be cleaning house, in a way, by posting all kinds of odds and ends which I've never posted before. Mostly this will consist of just posting self-penned lyrics and/or songs which I think are pretty good but which haven't really seen the light of day for various reasons.

The first post consists of the lyrics to my 1995 song "What Silly Children We Are," which, I believe, borrows its title from something the Christian Caroline Fry wrote in the 1800s, but I'm not really sure where I personally picked it up. Maybe in my philosophy classes? Anyway, this song was thematically similar to my other song "Cosmic Orphans", but the viewpoint is much more sympathetic, charitable and far less despairing than that song.

There's music too, but this song was performed publicly only once, at a coffeehouse back in 1995 or so. As of right now, there are no recorded versions, mainly because there were one or two bits I was never very happy with, musically speaking. However, I still kind of like the lyrics, so here they are. 

"Silly Children"

We are always so hard on ourselves
We never give ourselves a break
Living our lives in our personal hells
And never wanting to make mistakes

If only we could look at our lives
From behind a distant star
Maybe we could stop and then finally realize
Oh what silly children we are

Silly children
Silly children we are
Silly children
When you look from afar
And it only takes one change of perception
To send your life in a new direction
Silly children
We are

Sometimes self-righteous and quick to condemn
Common sense is our only defense
Always demanding and so reprimanding
When understanding makes more sense

If only we could look at ourselves
From behind another's eyes
Sisters and brothers when you finally realize
That we're just like children inside

Silly children
Silly children we are
Silly children
When you look from afar
And it only takes one moment's reflection
For everyone to make a deeper connection
Silly children
We are

And every day
We try to learn to grow
So knowing is nothing
And there is nothing to know

Silly children
Silly children

- G. Page, 1995

Childhood Trauma, The Breakup of the American Family, and "I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus"

As a child, I found the song "I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus" particularly disturbing. Here was a song, a mainstream holiday song no less, celebrating and implicitly condoning Kringle-ian infidelity! What the hell! Why is mommy kissing Santa Claus!!! Where's dad??? I don't think it'd be a "laugh" if he saw his wife messing around with some fat dude who's supposed to be delivering toys to well-behaved children! It's even worse because the music is all happy and buoyant like everyone's in on it (except clueless dad) and mom cheating is just the COOLEST THING IN THE WORLD!!! Oh yeah, baby, mom's a cheating hussy! And Santa's a home wrecker!!! WOO HOO!!! Good times everybody! Cue up those horns and pour me some more egg nog!!! What the hell!!! And what about Mrs. Claus alone at the North Pole? Did we just "conveniently" forget about her??? I don't know, I seriously believe this song may have been instrumental in instilling my life-long distrust of people. Of course, now that I'm older and I know what the song is REALLY about (parental fun and games) and what's REALLY going on, well... I think it's even more disturbing.

Henry's Dreams

In his dreams, Henry was sailing over the mountains, the cornfields and the crystal blue ocean, his majestic wings stretched wide... but in his waking hours, the poor sow was constantly tormented and mocked by people throwing buckets of liquified food at him and equating his silent longing with things that would never, ever, ever, come to pass.

The Most Depressing Christmas Lyrics Ever Written

"What Have They Done to Christmas?"

Verse 1:

I used to watch the snowflakes falling
A blanket of hope floating down
Now leaves on the trees start to wither
I'm walking on cold and hardened ground

Holiday time arrived this morning
People were swirling 'round my head
Visions that danced like a warning
Were making me stir in my bed

Chorus:

Asking
What have we done to Christmas?
What happened to that silent night?
I can't even tell that it's Christmas
Is it Christmas?
Do you remember Christmastime?

Verse 2:

Shoppers lined up to meet their savior
Pushing on unrelenting doors
They saw the signs and came for saving
While somebody else still begs for more

Chorus:

And I'm saying
What have they done to Christmas?
What happened to that silent night?
I can't even tell that it's Christmas
Is it Christmas?
Do you remember Christmastime?

Bridge:

What happened to charity and mistletoe?
What happened to caring every day?
Looking for harmony within a world
Where even the wise men lose their way

Chorus 2:

I keep asking
What have we done to Christmas?
What happened to comfort and good cheer?
I'm not really sure
It was ever that way
Could we have some Christmastime next year?
No peace on earth again, I fear
Please let there be Christmastime next year

Maybe next year

"I'm Your Owner, Not Your Lover (Song for My Dog)"

Chloe just turned nine so we celebrated her birthday by breaking out this old chestnut.

A Song for Father's Day!

A lot of people have been asking for the lyrics on this one, so I've included the lyrics and chords below. Basically, since there aren't a lot of songs for Father's Day, I took a poem I wrote for my dad and turned it into a song! It's pretty simple, so you can play and sing it for your dad too. Enjoy - and please be sure to favorite and share! 
Thanks so much, and Happy Father's Day! :)



"Strongest Man in the World"
by Glenn Page

Verse 1:
He can't pull a monster truck
By using just his teeth
And he can't lift an elephant
While trembling underneath
But when it came to raising us
You may not have heard
Don't you know that my dad
Is the strongest man in the world

Verse 2:
He can't make a speeding train
Stop dead in its tracks
And he can't hurl an aeroplane 
Up to the moon and back
But if you mention giving up
He'd say,"That's absurd!"
There ain't no doubt that that my dad
Is the strongest man in the world

Bridge:
'Cause all day he long he cares for us
From morn 'til setting sun
And all that love he's carrying
It must weigh a ton

Verse 3:
He don't need no big parade
Gold trophies in a case
No accolades, no serenades
A glove that shouts, "First Place!"
He won't ask for nothing
No matter what he deserves
So let me just say "Thank you"
To the strongest man in the world.

Coda:
He won't ask for nothing!
No matter what he deserves!
There ain't no doubt that my dad
Is the strongest man in the world.
Don't you know that my dad
Is the strongest man in the world

Chords:

Verse - 

D - D - G - D
D - f#m - em - A
bm - G - bm - E7
D - A - B flat C - D - D 

Bridge - 

G - G - D - D
G - G - Asus7-A7


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